So my girlfriend, Jessica, recently broke up with me, a year and a half of commitment, hard work, and too much money spent. Shes giving me my stuff back tomorrow. But I wasn't devastated when she left, I mean, I only cried once. But in the end, it really didn't matter that she left me, the thing that seemed to affect me the most was the fact she had my stuff, and also the fact she slept with some random guy that same night and for some reason decided to call and tell me about it, but afterwards I fucked up her home life, so I felt alot better. Her parents were on my side, no, her whole family was, calling her a slut behind her back, and everything, shes apparently grounded for the summer. (Ah well, I got what I wanted out of her.)

She told me "Boo hoo, get over it" when she left me, and I have been, Now it looks like shes the one who'll have to get over it

right after she left, I started dating, well looking for dates, and people to listen found a few people to listen for just a little, but they didn't seem to care much. but I found one girl I knew that just really caught my eye.
I went to the mall today to get a haircut, because I'm going to mexico on sunday. and well, I saw a friend there, I called out to her, she came up and hugged me, I said "What have you been up to?" she said "Dealing with a breakup". Of course I told her I was too, we talked and all, she got her hair cut short, I got my hair cut too. We shopped around for a while, then coincidentally, we were in a store, and Jessica of course walked in, so me and the girl walked out holding hands, of course it hurt me a bit to see Jessica in there. Well, me and the girl made out, she told me it felt right Then she had to go

Well, I'm not dating because I want a "Rebound", I'm dating because I hate being alone, and I want to be in a relationship, it seems I possibly found one, I like her, she likes me. it's all what her heart decides now

I'm not giving out her name just due to circumstances with her and a recent relationship that may cause problems.

made alot of friends today, and I've been lonely, but I'll be okay, because good love is on the way.

Tags: good love is on the way
Current Mood: excited
Current Music: Good love is on the way

So I've been getting more and more used to the whole driving thing, my friend described my situation as being in a "pre-20 life crisis" says he went through that phase as well so I'm not too worried, Jessica still doesn't seem to understand the concept, in fact the way she talks about it it almost seems as she expects everything will be handed to her her whole life

she claims that she can't wait to be "Independent" sadly for her, you'll never be independent, what with always having to work for money and pay bills and etc. But I don't poke at her about it, she tends to get offended when I do

I've been bored for the past few days of summer, so I'm looking to get a job, the last few days have felt like forever and I haven't even done jack-shit. So I assume I need something to do, so that's why I'll get a job, pretty much have to anyways for certain circumstances, I'm looking around tomorrow morning.

Other than that my spare time will be spent with Jessica/on the computer so anyone at all who reads what I do will be happy to know I'll be blogging alot more now, oh I'm actually getting into this thing called "Digg" right now, it's a bit fun reading all the articles, nice source for finding news I like, I have a profile on there, and hopefully my RSS feed from this LJ will go onto there aswell, so if this gets onto my digg page; Hey everyone! Or no one, whoever (Or whatever) is reading, or not reading.

Driving is fun. I'm more of a mellow driver it seems, 5 miles under the speed limit, and real laid back about it too, it's not as hard as I pictured it would be, anyways, moving on

SO I got my permit on the 30th, got my grandmothers car too, it's a 2000 pontiac bonneville, it's really nice, doesn't have too many miles on it, and runs like a beauty. I wasn't too excited to get it, I was moreso dreading it, I almost told my dad I didn't want to go get my permit.

Oh don't get me wrong, I knew I could pass, easy, and of course I did, with only two answers wrong, the thing is I'm 16 and life seems to be moving a bit too fast for me, three years ago me and my friends had no care in the world, we didn't drive, no, instead we rode our bikes down to the gas station, get some candy and a soda, or a slushy, and now suddenly I'm faced with life changing decisions, an overt sense of responsibility, and it just feels like I threw away my childhood

around me my relatives are dying, I have to bury my grandmother, and it just keeps hitting harder and harder, I never know what tomorrow is going to bring and it hurts to think about, I've lost sleep dreading tomorrow, I'm not good at growing up, as much as every teenager who's ready to go get their license, jump in a car and start driving, or every love drunk couple who want to get married so fast, I just want it to stop, and I want to slow down, I'm a kid. Inside and out and it's hard to deal with this fast paced world, I just want to slow down.

I'm not good at growing older, I'm only good at being young.
I find a bunch of kids from my school will take this and say "Wow, no wonder he's so immature". I don't care how much any of you deny it, all of you including me are kids, you're not "Mature" and trying to brand yourself with maturity only makes you seem even less mature. It doesn't make sense why people are in such a rush to grow up, then again maybe it doesn't make sense why I want to stay young.

What happens to us when we're younger? One day we're 5 years old and we tell our parents "I never wanna grow up!" suddenly we hit our teen years and all teens ever think about is "I'm gonna get a car and get married and get a job as soon as possible!" And yet I'm over here cherishing every free minute I have.

Maybe I'm the one thats wrong for thinking this way?
so scared of growing older
I'm only good at being young

Stop this train;
I want to get off and go home again

Today I was walking home
a man had come up to me
said we would walk a journey down a mile
I couldn't fall asleep

I felt waves move me under my feet,
flapping the asphalt like an old fan
they pushed me back
butterflies that rolled across the road that reject me, irked me forward
I walked, I walked, I walked into a million bicycles,
washing themselves down the road. They spun backwards.

my sense of smell intrigued, I felt the fur on the curb
and smelled a rain forest

I tried to get away as the people fell past my head, they fell nowhere
but I ran anyways, I kept running until I fell asleep, closing my eyes I saw everything

So I haven't posted in a while, in short; Jessica got her hair cut short for me, I'm in trouble, saw a soul acoustic guy last Saturday play at a Coffee Shop, he was really good, I even got him to play "Daughters" by John Mayer. schools about to end, I may have to drop out and get my GED. But life is still okay

ANYWAYS, today is mothers day, but I'm having such a great day? Why? Because of what happened yesterday, yesterday me and Jessica woke up at 6 to go to the "Race for the Cure" which is a Cancer donation run thing, we did the 5k race, which is 3 miles, we finished in 45 mins, and anyways after that it was about 9, the previous day I didn't think I'd be able to go to Guitar practice, because I thought the race for the cure would be longer than it really was, but it wasn't, so me and Jessica got ready since we were all sweaty and all that, and went to guitar practice, it was test day, and I got a 7 out of 10 so I was pretty proud

Anyways heres where the day went awesome, Jim, the guy who owns "Center Stage" called me and Jessica over and asked if we know a comedian named "Jeff Dunham" (A famous comedian/ventriloquist" Being the comedy central junkie I am I quickly exclaimed "Yes!" and he said "He's having a show tonight, I got 100$ worth of tickets, do you want them?" and of course our answer was Yes! He was doing a live show at the Oil Palace that day and we got the tickets, and I got my haircut, and then we went to the show at 6, he was hilarious

he did alot of Impros on his spark of insanity jokes and there was even this opening act comedian that called himself the "Guitar Guy" and Jeff Dunham even gave us a sample of his up and coming comedy show hes doing with comedy central, which is his Christmas special, hes shooting it in June, is what I find funny, but anyways yeah thats how it works, he showed us alot of jokes from there, played a few really funny songs, and even came back with "Bubba Jay", a puppet he stopped performing with, I got alot of pictures, didn't get any pictures of Walter sadly, or Jose Jalapeño, I believe is his name. Jeff also came up with alot of new jokes in Tyler hes planning on using in his christmas special.

But anyways that was my day yesterday, Jessica and I had a great time,
I'll post pics later, right now they're on my facebook

Tags: christmas, cure, dunham, for, insanity, jeff, of, race, spark, special, the, tour
Current Location: Homeee
Current Mood: happy

So yesterday I got invited to a band, starting out as bassist, then I told them, I'm much better at guitar so rhythm guitar would be nice, then I played a few riffs for the person who made the band, and they said I should be lead guitarist, so, I'm happy,

the past week I've had to work on a project for world Geo with my friend Tyler, and we got distracted basically the whole time, we were doing a news cast on Turkey, in Southwest asia so we had to film us talking about it as though we were news reporters,

the first attempt was a complete failure because he came over, we did it, (Drank 8 really powerful energy drinks while at it and walked a total of 12000 steps, step measurement courtesy of my phone.)

and anyways he came over, we filmed it all, and two days later when I went to go edit it and put in effects, it turned out, the movies cut out 5 seconds before we pressed "Finish" well, it backtracked anyways, so he had to come over once again, despite all the yelling that my girlfriend did at me for not being able to talk to her, and well.. we finished, and this was the result

(Video about to be uploaded)

found out a few days ago my friend "Jamaica" as I call her, (as she comes from jamaica) likes (or did like) me, her mom, in turn, however hates me, shes just a friend I text here and there, Jessica isn't the biggest fan of her. Anyways, thats a bit flattering

I'm also going to the guitar show in Dallas this weekend, second time in a row, don't know what guitar I should bring if any, oh and I'm buying tickets to a John Mayer and Colbie Callait concert with me and Jessica, they're playing in Dallas on August first

Got a new TV 26 inch,
That's all I can write as for now :]

I was talking to my friend Tyler, yesterday, and well,
Does it ever occur to anyone what America is now? Is it just me, a 16 year old boy forced to worry about my future in this failing country? Sure we hear about "oh they're chipping away at the constitution" but has anyone stopped and thought about it? If you're reading this, you're probably one of my friends and probably don't understand, but they're right when they say that the government is chipping away at the constitution

as an atheist, I feel that have a realistic perspective on America without hiding behind the "God has a plan" quote that is continuously spewed by ignorant people who don't want to admit the fact that America, love it or not, is really immature, we're that little snobby brat in the school yard who can't handle a few cruel words behind his back once in a while, we're that little brat to where if we're shoulder bumped in the hall, we instantly turn around like a child and kick the other person in the balls, also known as "bombing"

basically what I'm getting to is, I'm constantly asked, as a liberal, if I love America, and I'll reply "America needs to grow up", and of course they'll explode into flames, while screaming "Heresy!" at me for not agreeing with Americas current situation? Why is this? I'll tell you why, you're not allowed to have your own opinion anymore, America is not the Republic it used to be, if it even is at all anymore, no ones allowed to be unique, we don't have a set religion or set language, but when someone isn't a Christian, they're constantly put down for being curious humans, and when someone speaks a foreign language they're put down for being foreign, you're not allowed to be human anymore, because it strays away from the "Norm" we have in America

What is this norm?
America is violent, judgemental, snooty, paranoid, nosey, pushy, hypocritical childish brats, that don't want to let anyone live a life anymore. Who killed John Lennon? Why did the government monitor a peace activist almost 24/7? Was he a threat to america? To society? No he wasn't, he wanted peace, and the government didn't accept that, because again, it strays from the "Norm" that america knows so well, because normally, America is used to "Violence" and "If ya'll don't like it, ya'll dun need to giddy up outta hur" am I right, America?

I heard something the other day that kind of brought this thought on, "It's funny, almost 40 years after ML King dies, people are still pointing fingers and saying "You don't belong here"" and this is a typical American, intolerant, fascist pigs, we don't let anyone in, it's funny how much we hate illegal immigrants, which as far as I remember, we came to America, and being the immature, snotty brats we are, we killed thousands of native Americans by letting them fall in the trail of tears far away from where us "Proud, Noble, Americans" made our cozy, safe home, the home we stole from the native americans by force. they fell and began rotting in front of their family, died to walk away because we're intolerant, fascist, paranoid pigs, and now we won't let the Mexicans into our country because we're still, intolerant fascist pigs
and of course by saying this I'll get a bunch of people saying "Oh but that situation is different" but I'd like them to explain how, America is a bunch of murderers, America is a sickening place

I'm proud to be a TRUE American, a tolerant american, an american who believes in "Peace" unlike all of the rest of you intolerant people living here, all of you racists, you fascists, all of you intolerant politicians, all of you judgmental people, all of you people trying to tell people how to live their lives, because you think you own the world, all of you sickening "Missionaries" forcing your religion down peoples throats and not allowing hungry foreigners to eat until they convert to your religion, You "Americans" are sickening,

I accept people for who they are, and I say let them in, I know what america truly is and I'm not going to deny it just because if I don't, I'll be called "Unamerican" you intolerant murderers are unamerican, if you want a free country, stop being such a hypocrite

Break away from the "Norm" people, America doesn't have to be hated, and violent, we should accept people into our country because thats what its here for, is to be free, and no ones letting anyone be free anymore, Stop war, stop making nuclear weapons, just spread peace to everybody,

sincerely
-A 16 year old who has a better idea about the world than you do.

"You can bomb the world into pieces, but you can't bomb the world into peace"

Tags: america is a brat

So this is a story all about how,
my epic april fools prank all went down
and I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the heartbreaker of a girl in H-town

In New Braunfels, Texas on vacation one day
At Schlitterbahn where I spent most of my days
Chillin' Out maxin' relaxin all cool in a current river, outside of fun
When a girl named sian, who was up to no good
started flirting with me in my neighborhood
I got in one little relationship and then I got scared
I said "I'd like to date you but you live too far away"

I whistled to get away but when she came near
Her angst in denial and pain in her mirror.
If anything I could say this girl was rare
but I thought nah forget it "Gotta move on with my life"

I pulled up to a girl named Jessica duenes
and I yelled to sian "Hey guess what? I'm gonna date her!"
I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there
to sit on my throne as the king of april fools pranks


So today was amazing, I told myself I would do it and I did, I HAD to pull another april fools prank on someone, just this time, my methods were a tidbit heartbreaking and cruel.I targeted my ex girlfriend of nearly a year, sian, and her friend Elizabeth. me and elizabeth talked alot during my relationship with Sian, and I could tell she didn't necessarily like it, well after a while me and sian broke up, and kind of stopped talking, because soon after I got a new girlfriend, Jessica, and I never thought it was a good idea to talk to an ex, but me and Elizabeth did still talk frequently,

Well anyways yesterday Elizabeth uploaded a picture of her (Which looked amazing) so I commented on it, and today at school Sian got mad at her, and we were talking about it, so then I had the bright idea to april fools her into thinking me and elizabeth were dating (Of course Jessica is going to be more than angry about this) We changed our relationship status on facebook and blah-blah-blah, and then I called her and talked to her about it, and it was obvious she was mad, we kept on with the stunt, making her more and more upset even though she obviously denied it, along with that we were rickrolling her at 100 miles an hour,

and the end result, we three wayed her on the phone finally, I didn't talk until we told her it was an april fools joke, but other than that, it was obvious she was upset, I only recorded half of it, but heres all the online conversations between me and her and sian and elizabeth on facebook


And heres the video all recorded on youtube! I posted some pictures in it of the conversation we had on facebook

Tags: epic fools sian gets pranked and rickrol
Current Mood: accomplished

Anyways, heres a post related to my life I guess, after all the atheist based posts, well first of all I got a new phone, so if you know me, give me your number so I can add you to my phone and give you a call, and that means you Cecily. Anyways, the phone is an LG chocolate, it's really a piece of crap, I can't get a signal in my house, I have to go sit outside to talk, so it's really pissing me off, bought it off of eBay, they didn't include the USB cable sadly

Anyways to anyone wondering about the sex scandal comment;
So the kind loving all innocent and good-doing christians we know and love are at it again! with a NEW sex scandal (No surprise. eh?)
a few weeks back, my pastor was fired because he had been having sex with women in the church I used to go to (pleasant hill baptist church)
now I know the pastor personally, and his wife and kids, well guess what? He ruined two families with an affair and the reputation of the church with it, it was all over the news, and the church sent out letters to most all of the town, I thought he must feel like crap, I tried to look for a news story online but couldn't find one, if you look for some reason and find it tell me.

Luckily I haven't gone to that church in years, Hah. But I'm a bad person for being atheist, right?

Tags: christians getting funky

So I just got back from Arkansas after helping cleaning out my grandmothers house, since we have to sell it now that she died

On the way there, (Magnolia arkansas) I was thinking all about religion, I looked at the sky, and the sun and the ground constantly comparing the two, how significant are we in this universe? Why is it that christians seem to think we're it. That we're the reason for the universe? Why do they feel so significant to the world when if you get far away from the earth we're not much more than a speck of dust? I know that sounds a bit like my own little play on "Pale blue dot" but I was really thinking that, it really makes you feel kind of sad, it gives you that small feeling

Thats probably why we have male enhancement pills

ANYWAYS, upon realizing this I decided I'd count out the amount of churches arkansas had (It's apparent these cousinfuckers would have plenty of churches for all the sins they commit to their god) And I was right, but not as much as I thought I would be,
upon first driving into arkansas from texarkana, down the highway a bit there was a cross section in the road, and on the sides, there was a church, next to a church, across the street from a church, which was next to a gas station, which was next to a taco bell, which was next to a catholic church, NO JOKE. There was church after church within block after block after driving down the road. Did I mention there were liquor stores with crosses on them? (Get drunk for jesus! Yeah!)

That wasn't the worst of it, the radio stations were either all crappy christian rock bands (Rock out for Jesus!) which all christian rock bands are simply bands who play powerchords on guitar over and over and OVER in the key of G while singing "Hallelujah" over and over for the chorus in the key of F, with crappy drummer and bassist, to form the most uncreative ideas for music ever, and there were a few hit stations, sadly these are the stations that you would call "Behind the times" especially when one radio station classified Madonnas 1990's hit "Strike the pose" a modern day hit. Being a musician, this combination both made me laugh, and make me want to kill myself in the most gruesome fashion.

Well we finally got to her house, and when about a mile away from it, I saw a sign that said "Come visit God's lighthouse", so I walked there, it was a small church (Like the rest of the million churches in the now ghetto suburbs) and the lighthouse wasn't anything special, it was a novelty thing really, just a few thrown together 2x4s with a floodlight on top, at the bottom it had a little panel that said "This lighthouse will be used to spot God when he comes back to save us and our sins" or something around that, then abunch of scripture crap

now this would be touching if it weren't for three things
1. Lighthouses are near shores, we were far from one
2. Lighthouses aren't necessarily used to spot ANYTHING and if we're made in god's image, I doubt a lighthouse that high would be able to spot him, and I highly doubt it'd magically point down towards him.
3. The lighthouse was off.

With all this said, I was very surprised I didn't see assloads of Mike huckabee posters thrown up everywhere

Well I was pretty much bored the rest of the time, we headed back home today I wasn't really looking for anything else to laugh about, and there wasn't (Except I did, sadly, see a "God hates fags" poster on the way back

I know not everyone in arkansas is a super religious person, but I found the level of religion in arkansas hilarious.

Whats the most religious place you've ever been in?

Tags: atheist arkansas religious hell etc